Skip to main content

Marriage Life- Asia's Perspective

By

Go ahead and throw all of your knowledge about marriage right out of the window. Well, that is, if your knowledge of marriage comes from movies, society, and/or an outside/inside perspective of an ungodly marriage (where both spouses are not Christ followers). I have been exposed to all of the above perspectives of marriage and let me tell you, they were and are no help to understanding marriage the way it was intended to be understood.

Who created marriage? A. Celebrities B. The big bang C. Marriage is meant to be subjective

Well, A, B, and C are all incorrect answers. The Creator of marriage is the same Creator who created you and me. His name is God and He introduces Himself to His people (us) in Exodus 20:2 where He says, “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.”

What a gracious God! He brings us out of things and gives us Himself! 
Marriage as you have heard many times before, is hard and is hard work. This will never be a false statement. It is reality. Let that sink in. MARRIAGE IS HARD AND IS HARD WORK. When you are married, you will NOT escape this truth, so the sooner you come to this reality, the better off you will be. Think about all the relationships that you have. Mother-Son, Mother-Daughter, Father-Son, Father-Daughter, Sibling-sibling, Best-friend-Best-friend, etc. Are those some of the closest people to you? Are those relationships faultless? They are not. No relationship on this earth will be faultless. Conflict is healthy. Communication is healthy. They cause growth.
 
Greg and I have been married for 7 months. They have been very beautiful months. Months filled with days. Days that are filled with up’s and down’s (Yes, in one day). Greg and I courted for 2 years and 28 days before we were married. We had up’s and down’s in our courtship. We were not naive to believe that our marriage would be any different. By God’s grace, He has allowed Greg and I to conflict well. We do not name call, storm out on each other, hit, or curse. We talk. We communicate. We pray. We resolve to grow in Christ. Our courtship was a long-distance courtship. We spent many nights on the phone and on Skype talking. We learned how to communicate. We learned how to share our feelings when we were displeased, offended, or disrespected. This is a life skill that will work wonders in your future marriage!

Do you ever really wonder why there is a 50% divorce rate? Why the average length of a supposed “perfect” celebrities marriage is about two years? Well, it sure is not because marriage is always blissful and your spouse will always make you happy. Ha! Again, that is movie scene lies. Social media, “I will show you only my “good” life”, lies! You will hurt each other, but there is grace and through the very same grace God gives us, you will be able to extend this grace to your spouse! Marriage is about being selfless. You serve your spouse like Jesus served you and your spouse does the same. You serve, love, extend grace, and bear the nine fruit of the spirit with consistency though God.

I was never the girl who dreamed of marriage. I did not allow marriage to cloud my single service to the Lord and His people. I knew that relationships would be hard and I knew that the desires I had to be married would be fulfilled. If you also have the desire to marry and/or have children, trust that God will provide you with your desires when He knows that you are ready for marriage. Pursue God, grow in your relationship with God, do NOT waste your singlehood waiting to be someone’s spouse. Marriage is merely an extension of the ministry you began as a single. You marry and continue to serve God and His people. That does not STOP! After all you are ambassadors of God. Here for a momentary time to share the hope of Jesus with unbelievers. The good news is that Christ came and died for the sins of the world and desires to change us from the inside out so that our short days on the earth will be filled with meaning! Our meaning can only be found in the One who gives it to us, God!

So who created marriage?

“The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.”

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” Genesis 2:24

So, if God created marriage, who should you go to for the answers on how to have a happy marriage, where love multiples and does not divide?

Cosmopolitan magazine, self-help books, Oprah, Iyanla Vanzant: Fix my life, People magazine, VH1, MTV, BET?

Yes, you will need to go to God. He has 66 incredible books called the Holy Bible, that are designed to help you live this life abundantly! Open up your daily bread and EAT! 



 *Leave Greg and I comments on topics you would like us to talk about next. Nothing is too personal.
**If you would like to receive our posts to your email address. Feel free to subscribe by email on the right. It looks like this:



Comments

  1. Temitayo DadaApril 24, 2020 at 7:14 AM

    Thank you so much for this . Can one still be romantic in expressions and communication in a Christian courtship?

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Boundaries in a Courtship (A Woman's Perspective)

By
 In regards to a biblical courtship, this topic has to be one of my favorites. A courtship that is without boundaries is bound to lead to trouble in purity (hahaha… nice play on words right?… not trouble in paradise, but…Yea…okay). It is very important for both the man and the woman to discuss, agree, and intentionally implement boundaries to make certain that honoring God and each other’s purity are most important. Greg and I talked about implementing boundaries within the first few weeks of our courtship. Together we discussed the boundaries that we wanted to implement in our courtship and why we wanted to implement them. Here is the list of boundaries that Greg and I agreed upon, early on in our courtship. 1.      We would not kiss each other (lips, cheek, hand, anywhere) until our wedding day. 2.      We would not hold hands. 3.      We would not talk with each other until we had first spent...
3 comments
Read more

Boundaries in a Courtship (A Man's Perspective)

By
The area of boundaries is probably one of the most important topics a couple will face on their way to marriage. The way boundaries are approached, set, and handled is one of the primary factors in how successful the relationship will be in areas of purity (whether that be spiritual, emotional, or physical purity). If that be the case, how are we to think about boundaries and use them in a God-glorifying way? There are a few passages that have helped me think through this topic. First, let’s consider Ephesians 5:25-27. It says “ 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. (ESV)” Here, there is a command, an example, and purpose, and an ultimate goal. The command is for husbands to love their...
3 comments
Read more

Affirmation and Acceptance (A Man's Perspective)

By
 Affirmation and acceptance are the doorway to freedom and security in a relationship. If they are lacking, trust will be shaky and communication will be full of tension and hesitation. But if affirmation and acceptance are present in a relationship, vulnerability becomes safer and embarrassment is no longer a hindrance to true self-expression. When I say “affirmation,” what I mean is affirming someone’s worth and value. You can do it through words or gestures. When Asia affirms me, she communicates that I am someone worthy of admiration and respect. When I affirm Asia, I communicate that she is a unique, invaluable treasure, a “rose among thorns,” as Solomon puts it (Song of Songs 2:2). Everyone wants to be cherished and respected. You can see it everywhere. Many athletes put in massive amounts of time in practice in order to be respected and valued as a competitor. Artists do the same. Often, a guy will sleep with loads of women in order to feel affirmed as a ma...
2 comments
Read more