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Temptation in my relationship!

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Temptation: Luring souls from delight in God since the fall of man. If sin wore a t-shirt, that’d be the slogan written on it. And it’s true. Ever since Satan tempted Eve, saying “Did God really say,” temptation has been plaguing the souls of man, hindering them from worshipping God in spirit and in truth. But what is temptation and how does it happen? What danger does it pose to my relationship? More importantly, how can/should we fight it?



Simply put, temptation is an event where an individual is being enticed or persuaded to disobey God. For a more vivid description, consider James 1:14-15. “But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.” The word “lured” refers to being drawn away, like a fish whose attention has been captivated by a shrimp in the water, not realizing that the shrimp is bait on a hook! When we are tempted, our attention is drawn away from God’s glory and the beauty of His righteous law. Something else begins to glow with a distracting allure, causing us to shift our focus from God and gaze upon it. That “something else” is sin. Sin looks beautiful, titillating our desires, enticing us to partake in it. This moment of desire, when the heart is distracted by the beauty of sin, is the event of temptation.



Also note the progression given in this passage in James. Temptation starts with a desire, which leads to an action whose effects lead to death. This means that if we are going to fight temptation, we need to start at the level of our desires. Desires are the soil in which the plant of temptation grows, so we must start there. The question is “How?” How do we fight desires or guide them in the proper direction? The answer is with enlightened affections. You fight desire with desire.



The reason I call our weapon against temptation “enlightened affections” is because these affections are not mere inclinations of the heart. They are passionate dispositions informed and motivated by truth. Tempting desires that lead to sin are not rooted in truth, but instead are produced by the deceitfulness of sin. Sin presents itself to us as beautiful. It always promises a good time. It is like the woman in Proverbs whose lips drip honey, but her end is “as bitter as wormwood” and her feet lead down to Sheol. It lies by telling us to question God’s goodness and the perfection of His law. Temptation causes us to question God’s Word like the serpent in the garden, then persuades us that God is holding out on us, trying to suppress and hinder our delight as His creatures. This is not true! God’s will is good, acceptable, and perfect! His law is perfect, reviving the soul! His commandments are pure, enlightening the eyes! God wants us to find joy in Him, His way, and His truth, which is far greater than anything sin could ever offer. When we find ourselves being tempted, we must fight the deceiving allure of sin with the true beauty of God. We must turn to look at Someone better, whose glory overpowers the persuasiveness of sin. We also need to look past the outward adornment of sin and perceive its true ugliness. Sin put God on a cross. Sin caused Him to undergo unbearable torments that cannot even be put into words. Sin wants to drive you as far away from God as possible, all the way to Hell. Sin stands head-to-head against God and says “DIE!” Is that what we want? Is that what we wish to say to God? Do we want to indulge in that for which Christ died? Heck no! When we meditate on these things, temptation begins to lose its luster and allure and we can see and act clearly.


Temptation comes in all shapes, sizes, and varieties. It definitely will be/is present in your relationship and it is your job to deal with it. Each temptation is an opportunity to draw near to God or walk away from Him as a couple. Therefore, if you make a habit of yielding to temptation, you’ll find yourselves far from the standard and joy that God has for you as a couple. In my experience, sexual temptation is incomprehensibly stronger and seemingly unavoidable while you’re in a relationship with someone you love and long to give yourself to. Each temptation for Asia and I is an opportunity for us to find joy in each other without God. It’s our job as a couple to commit to resisting temptation and turning to God. It’s my responsibility as the leader to say no to temptation and submit to the authority of God in protection of Asia’s purity. When it comes to temptation, your joy in God is at stake. What will you do?

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